All about FATE...

She is a mirror, shining back at me with a world of possibilities. 
She is a witness, who sees me at my worst and best (and loves me anyway). 
She is my partner in crime, my midnight companion, someone who knows when I am smiling, even in the dark. 
She is my teacher, my defense attorney, my personal press agent and yes, my shrink. 

But most of all - she is my confidant.  She knows my thoughts, actions and words before I do most of the time.  She has examined me carefully for 20 years and yet still calls me almost every day.  If that's not dedication, I don't know what is.

Although we didn't go to elementary or middle school together and didn't really know each other in high school, we found one another.  We coincidentally married in (and divorced out) of the same family.  Upon departure, we figured something very important out.

We were different from one another... yet perfectly compatible.  We were destined to become sisters.

As I reflect back on the last 20 + years of friendship, I can't really pinpoint a single time where we were distant in our hearts.  Even living in different countries at one time my thoughts have always remained steady on my best friend.  In the lowest moment of my life, she was calm, loving and supportive.  She spent countless hours counseling me through the grief of losing my mom.

Which by the way they share this same special day.  Coincidence?  I like to think not.  The two women I have loved the most in this life were born on the same day.  Cancers.  I should have known from just that smidgen of information we were destined to be tethered forever.  They are so much alike it floors me.  They share the same honesty, loyalty and sarcasm.  It's an amazing similarity.  But most of all - they totally, completely GET ME. 

If I ever die suddenly, she knows what to do.  She loves Hubs and my kids as much as I do (at times more!)  She would spring into action, protect and support them and pull them through with anything they needed... without even thinking twice.  She would bear her own grief privately to give them all her strength.  She is completely selfless when it truly matters the most.

And THAT, my friends, is what life is all about.  Having a connection, knowing in your heart someone has your back, feeling unconditional love... it just doesn't get any better than that.  We tried to explain that to her daughter a few weeks ago.  Not everyone in life finds that perfect friend that they will hold onto for life.  But when you do... hold on tight and never let it go.

Cheers to the best day ever - the day my momma was born 76 years ago and 34 years later my best friend came along.  I happen to believe it's fate because, well, I'm a dreamer.

I love this beautiful woman!!!

Have a great Sunday, friends!

Jen

FRIDAY FAVES!!

Another weekend has arrived and I am stoked!  We are in the full swing of sun, fun and relaxation, forcing down time and enjoying life.  I am in love... it is my fave time of year!

Below are my faves for the week from around the interweb.  Enjoy, friends!

FAVE POOL

Backyard pool.  Beach.  Why not combine both?  I'm thinking this would be AWESOME!!

FAVE YUMMO

I love me some sushi!  I've expanded out a lot in the past 5 years and eat pretty much anything but sushimi.  This just screams to me.. I love dragon rolls!  Oh.... and did I tell you Hubs knows how to make sushi at home?  Heaven.

FAVE 80'S WINO

I love the 80's.  And I love wine.  Why not combine the two??  LOVE!

FAVE REMINDER

This is fantastic.  Yes friends, go somewhere new.  Even if it is in your own backyard.  Try new things and you will live life to its fullest!!

FAVE SNAPSHOT

Newborn pictures are just so darn cute anymore.  Long past are the days with the Walmart canned photos.  People are getting so creative!  This one just screams to me!!  LOVE!

FAVE DIY

I love making stuff for my house.  This would be so incredibly easy!!  I love it's simplicity and obviously it's totally functional.

FAVE PACKER

Hubs and I love to hike.  We certainly don't do it enough but when we finally get to a place where we can just pack up and go, I gotta have this.  LOVE it!

FAVE COMBO

Love me some blueberry.  Love me some lemon.  Love them together.  YUMMO!  Click here for the recipe ---->  Blueberry Lemon Bread

FAVE CONCEPT

I usually shy totally away from strapless bras as I hate how they bunch everything up. I can't seem to find the perfect fit.  So THIS is how the stars do it.  Do you think it works?  I envision an hour in the bathroom to emerge with uneven boobies.  YIKES.

FAVE FUNNY

Yep, this is me.  I am always, always singing in the car at the top of my lungs.  Heck, I'm always singing... period!

FAVE SINK

Way to kick up the old school farm sink!  I love this look... so simple yet so beautiful!

Have a great weekend, friends!

Jen

We have officially dropped below 100 days on our countdown to the arrival of Little Lentil! 

This is one proud Naan.  And I'm sure Sassy is happy as well.  She has crossed over the half way point a few weeks ago and on the downward spiral to D-Day (delivery day).

As I flipped through photo albums this weekend looking for a specific picture, I stumbled upon one of Bubba when he was a little boy.  Had I not been in the picture with him I would have thought it was Nugget.  The similarity was STRIKING.  But most days when I look at pics of Nugget, I think he looks exactly like my beautiful daughter.  Just depends on how Sassy he's being at the moment.

So I sat quietly, closed my eyes and tried to picture our beautiful granddaughter.  Needless to say it was much harder than I thought.  I kept defaulting to a baby E, which seriously would be perfect.  He just so happened to be one of those babies that was beautiful as a boy or would have been as a girl!  But I'll let you decide...

I particularly loved his drool :).  His big eyes and chubby cheeks just melted my heart. 

They still do.  I'm pretty sure they always will.

I cannot wait to get my arms around this new little one.  Now that I've experienced being a Naan first hand I can't imagine anything better.  Seeing the grands with such a unique mixture of their mom and dad along with their own unique personalities is so much fun.

And personality we have in SPADES.

October can't get here fast enough.  Normally I want summer to CRAWL but not this time.  I need it to FLY!

Happy Monday, friends!
Jen

Another 4th Come and Gone...

I prepared myself to be a little bit jaded this Independence Day.  I'm still 1,600 miles away from my west coast kids which makes me sad.  Especially since I spent last holiday with Sassy and Nugget loving all over them.  Here are my fave pics of last year:

Oh, and Hubs had to work.

We started our holiday at the local community fireworks blast (and about an hour of rain).  Little Guy and I decided to shake it off - we played in the rain rather than complain about it.  After filling our bellies we climbed into the back of Hubs' truck and watched the show.  Although a breezy 63 degrees, it was wonderful.

The 4th brought a day of swimming, sun and fun with my BFFs fam.  Since she absolutely LOVES when I'm sentimental, here goes:  I LOVE THAT FAMILY!!  Not in a "aren't they cool to hang out with" kind of way either.  I completely, 100% love all of them.  They are fantastic.  Self professed "sisters", BFF and I have been together officially just over 20 years.  We have been through everything together:  marriages, divorces, births, deaths and every life event in between.  I can be myself completely with them, in times of vulnerability they are a constant support of me.  And in times of joy, I only have to look over my shoulder to see them there.  They are my true family and I am completely blessed to have each of them.  They show my family true unconditional love which only strengthens my belief in the fact that although we can't chose our family, we can certainly create one.

The last two decades seem to have flown by.  Our kids are older now - mine with a family of his own and hers driving and considering colleges.  Our little ones are still friends and enjoy each other's company.  Our husband's may not have chosen each other as friends originally in their lives but they like one another just like brothers in law would do.

I took the little ones (hee hee... I know they aren't so little but I can't help myself) to a concert Friday night.  Watching the two of them be themselves even though they are so different told me they too have embraced being family.  I cannot believe these are the same two children:

Hubs and I trekked down to our local farmer's market Saturday morning and hit the jackpot.  Fresh fruit and veggies galore.  We absolutely love this part of summer.  It holds the promise for me when we have our own little piece of earth we can sustain our lives with fresh grown food.  

We wrapped up our weekend attempting to camp outside.  Hubs and I absolutely loved camping in our 20's, often dragging Bubba to rivers to canoe, cook out and sleep under the stars.  Little did I remember that sleeping on the ground is HARD.  20 years definitely left some scars on these bodies of ours.  As we watched little guy snooze away, Hubs and I were reminded how much we have changed.  I'm proud to say we made it two hours.  By 2:30 am, we were all snuggled comfortably in our beds.  I definitely see an air mattress in our future if we attempt this away from home.

As I sit quietly this morning, I cannot help but take stock of how blessed I feel.  My family is healthy, we are happy and we are complete.  Whatever life challenges are thrown our direction I know in my heart we have the love and support of our family.  

I wonder if they can help me out with this scorching sunburn I picked up at the pool yesterday.  There isn't enough aloe in the world.

I hope your weekend was filled with fun and love, friends.  The middle of the summer has arrived and in just a few short weeks fall will be upon us.  Take time to soak up the sun, love those around you and don't forget to laugh a little bit!

Happy Sunday, friends!

Jen

FRIDAY FAVES!!

Another Independence Day has come and gone.  I had a long conversation yesterday with little guy trying to illustrate the gravity of what our military has sacrificed for our freedom.  He has read about war, seen movies about Seals and Battleships but I'm not completely convinced he can understand the individual sacrifices that are taken.

It is as simple as this:  when you first enter the United States military, you "enlist".  Basically, you give yourself over to the institution.  WOW.  That is heavy.  Most people that I know would not tolerate a single other human being yelling in their face for ANY reason.  They wouldn't agree to menial tasks like standing and staring at the water for hours at a time just for fun.  And they certainly wouldn't be told how to dress.

Although admittedly I am jealous about that part.  I hate making clothing choices.

As he crossed the finish line in his fasted 5k to date, he felt pride.  I promptly took him to the food tent and shook hands with a veteran.  I thanked him for his service to our country.  His eyes lit up and he responded with a slight "why, you're welcome, ma'am".

We closed our evening in traditional fashion blowing up everything in sight.  I asked little guy and my niece if they knew why we lit firecrackers on the 4th of July.

"Well, it's to celebrate our freedom.  Originally men just shot off guns but that probably wouldn't be a good idea now."

Love babes.  They make me smile.

Below are my faves for the week.  Enjoy!

FAVE FASHION

Ahhh.  I absolutely love this.  Comfy.  Casual.  Totally my style, if I had my own style.

FAVE MOTIVATOR

Yep, he is still one of my faves.  Not Christian Grey material.  But I totally love him anyway.

FAVE DESTINATION

Yes please.  Thank you.

Calella, Costa brava, Palafrugell SPAIN

FAVE PARTY IDEA

I had a very, very bad experience once in my life with a watermelon concoction, so I am terrified of trying this idea again.  However, I can't help but admit that I love the way they have turned this into a keg itself.  Brilliant.

FAVE EXERCISE

Hubs and I are completely addicted to BBT.  Yes, that would be Big Bang Theory.  It wasn't always that way though.  When the show aired on prime time I found Sheldon's character completely annoying so after one episode I never watched it again.  Now?  I'm not sure I could fall asleep at night without at least a glimpse of the show.  And yes, I'm a weirdo that oddly thinks Sheldon is a bit cute.  Sorry friends... I like smart!  So how great is this workout plan?  I KNOW it would work!!

FAVE SCRUMPTIOUS

I'm not a huge chicken finger kinda gal but I had a variation of these last week and absolutely fell in love.  The sweetness along with the crunchy was my kinda love.  Yep, gotta try this one out and see if it's close to what I found!  Click here for the recipe ----> Coconut Chicken Strips with Honey Mango Dipping Sauce

FAVE FUNNY

Probably the most influential movie of my generation, so of course I think this is completely hilarious.  Oh, and add it to the fact I would probably not have gotten married if I had to date during the "texting" generation (see post from Wednesday this week).

Still, I think it's funny!

FAVE DIY

I love the color of copper, so no doubt I fell in love with this idea.  I have seen it before on floors but never in this format.  How easy would it be to make a bar out of pennies?  Talk about strong... it would last forever.  Yep, I love it.

FAVE FUR KID

Oh man, melt my heart.  Something about that fluffy hair and those gorgeous blue eyes just captivates me.  Love, love, love this pup!

FAVE FLOW CHART

This goes out to all my friends that are teen parents.  Print this puppy out and hand it to your kiddos as they start to plan their first tats.  Yes, we live in that generation.  Tell them no all you want but some kids are just determined and the moment they hit 18 will do it anyway whether you like it or not.  I'm proof... just ask my kiddo.

Personally, I love this!  Don't go all lib on me... you have to admit it generates a giggle.  My first tat was on a drunken girls trip in 1994 in a hole in the wall in Santa Fe, New Mexico.  I figured I'd bring a cool piece of jewelry home.  Little did I know...

Have a fantastic weekend, friends!!

Jen

LOL, IDK, ILY...

As I consider the technology that has emerged in the past two decades, I know one thing to be absolutely certain.  There is no way Hubs and I would be married.

When we met 20 years ago, neither of us had a cell phone.  We both had actual land lines... the plugged in kind that hung in the kitchen with the 30 foot cord.  As Hubs began to court me, he called me on the phone and we SPOKE.  Shocker, I know, to the younger generation.  He had a job at the time that required a significant amount of travel, taking him all over the country extending through weekends.  It made our actual dating scene quite difficult (not to mention I was a single mom at the time).  So we accommodated his schedule as best we could.  We had standing date sessions on the phone, long after I put Bubba to bed and his work was complete.  Many nights we sat on the phone for four hours at a time, listening to each other breathe into sleep.  In fact it was not uncommon for me to fall asleep on the end of the phone simply because neither one of us wanted to hang up the phone.

It was romantic.  It was alluring.  It made me want him even more.

Hubs would call and give me his itinerary, including name and address of hotels he stayed.  And to stay connected, I would buy him cards in advance of his trips.  I would write out love notes and mail them before he would arrive, leaving an imprint of me in whichever city he happen to visit.

Upon landing back in Kansas City, he would always come to my house first before coming home... no matter the time.  We would stand on my front porch at the end of our visit and hold each other for a long time.  I often would cry when he would leave.

He had a value system I longed for (although at the time didn't realize it).  He wouldn't stay the night with me as I had a son to wake up with in the morning.  He always put my parenting responsibilities first.

He still does.

We are both so busy with parenting, sports and our careers.  We rarely speak to each other during a day if at all.  We leave texts unanswered many times during our busy lives apart.

As I watch the years unfold I often wonder if we only text each other what would have become of our relationship.  Those hours on the phone helped us to really know each other, understand our hopes and dreams for the future and ultimately, fall in love.  I'm positive the outcome would have been different had those been words typed in short hand on a cell phone.

I'm grateful we met the way that we did.  My memories of us falling in love are some of the best moments of my life.  The five months we dated before he proposed were filled with a growing friendship that would propel us into a love that would last forever.

Well, at least 20 years anyway.  I guess there is still time for an annulment (since we can't use the D word in our house... EVER.)

To all my single friends trying to date in this crazy age I have one piece of advice.  PUT DOWN THE CELL PHONE.  Forget the Facebook messaging.  Don't tweet about how you feel about another person.  Oh, and in case you are wondering... this applies to all my MARRIED friends as well.  PUT DOWN YOUR PHONES!

Just pick up the phone and SAY it to them.  Better yet, look into their eyes.  I have a feeling that might take you further than you can possibly imagine.

But what do I know?

Have a great Wednesday, friends!

Jen

And so it Began...

July.  This time 20 years ago I was completely stressed out of my mind.  It was super, duper hot in 1993 - hotter than it had been in years.  I had just been in what has become the worst car accident in my life with a great friend.  I was busy at my first grown up job that I had been at less than a year.  I was trying to potty train my son who wouldn't sleep unless it was in my bed.  And I was about to be married... again.

It's no secret that Hubs is my second marriage.  But what might be a secret is how we have managed to make it work 20 YEARS. 

Yes, that's what I said.  20.  At the end of this month, we will have our 20th wedding anniversary.

The way we met should tell you everything you need to know.  Even if you don't believe in fate, destiny or soul mate crap, you should now.  Because these two people were fated to be together.

The summer prior to our wedding date was a rough one.  I had gone through a divorce and come out the other end, slightly scathed and bitter and most definitely sad.  I felt like a failure.  I was a tired single mom who back then didn't split custody 50/50.... I had the every other weekend gig with my ex branding me responsible to raise my son virtually alone.  I cooked dinner with my toddler son and ate alone most nights, something unheard of among most 20 year olds.  I had zero intention of dating anyone ever again let alone marrying anyone.

After deciding to co-habitate with a girlfriend, she along with two other friends decided the best solution to all of this was for us to take a trip out of town.  We were completely broke so a camping / float trip was the most we lavish vacation we could afford.  We were so excited!

After driving 3 hours away from home, we settled in a crazy party campground with a ton of people.  The next day, we did the Missourah thing and floated down the river in our canoes, beers in tow. 

We met some new friends as most hot girls do on a float trip in Missouri.

Amazingly later that night, we would discover these people lived 15 minutes from us.  Strange given we were 3 hours from home.  Maybe just a coincidence I suppose?

Against the advice of my friends, I gave a boy my telephone number.  I kinda liked him.  He didn't try to hit on me, he was quiet, unassuming and kinda funny.  I liked to talk to him - he was pretty smart.  So I thought if nothing else I would make a new friend. 

He called me.  We went out a few times.  I met him at a friend's house on my kid-free weekends to relax and have some fun.  And I always, always heard him (along with all his friends) talk about a "best friend" that I had never met or seen in the months I had known him.  I thought it was weird that he had this great, fantastic friend that was never around.

One evening as I stood in the living room of one of these house parties I looked up to see a man enter the house that I had never seen before.  He was confident, a little shy and wouldn't stop looking at me.  He had a girl in tow but never even acknowledged she was there once they entered the house.

As I looked up from the radio and made eye contact with him, I knew right away.  Cliche as it might sound, it's the complete truth.  RIGHT AWAY, friends.  Somehow, someday I would be with that man.  I forgot all about the guy I was seeing.  He forgot he was with someone as well.  And we couldn't stop talking.  His stare burned through me like nothing I had ever felt before.  He gave me his entire attention like I was the most important person in the world, even though I had just met him.  It was a night I will never, ever forget in my entire life.  I gave him my telephone number and he called the next day.

A few logistics needed to be worked through but eventually, less than a month later, I was with that man... and still am.

I've asked Hubs many times what he felt that night when he saw me.  A hopeless romantic at heart I longed for him to say he felt his soul move.  Felt his heart flutter.  Felt some amazing gravitational pull towards me.

Nope.  His response has always been so simple.

"I thought you looked HOT."

Yes, girls... we make boys far more complicated than they really need to be.  Sometimes it takes that simple spark to begin a life journey with the one you will love forever.  Forget all those forced dating websites where everyone hides behind embellished profiles.  Face to face, talking and laughter.... that's what makes the good stuff last.

Thank GOD I looked hot that night.  Who knows what would have happened if I had on sweats and a pony.

But I think I know....

Happy 1st of July, friends!!

Jen