Your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
David seemed pretty confident about himself. I bet he didn't have to get his kids out the door in the morning.
I rushed down the stairs this morning in a panic. Like most mornings, I was afraid of being late. No friends, I didn't sleep in. Quite the contrary. I was up early, tending to Jackson and Bella, unloading and reloading the dishwasher, moving laundry, packing little guy's lunch. And like most days lately, I was having trouble getting it all done.
Little guy likes ham and cheese for lunch. I ran out of cheese yesterday.
I usually pack fresh grapes in his bag. I ran out of grapes on Friday and didn't shop this weekend.
And of course, I couldn't get him outta bed. Oh, I tried... trust me. I asked nicely. Hubs reminded on his way past his room. Sure, he moved.... to the couch. By the time I finished getting myself ready, he was back to sleep.
As I rounded the corner of the entryway I could see his legs hanging off the sofa. I was instantly mad at him. He had wasted all the time he had to dress, eat, brush his teeth, get his shoes on and pack ready to go by sleeping.
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| Not taken this morning... no time for cameras! |
So of course, I yelled at him. Channeling Pattie Taylor, I threw a tantrum.
"Why do you always do this to me? Why must you disobey and move so slowly in the morning? Don't you understand that I have a meeting and now I'm going to be LATE??"
He stared at me silently. His lack of response fueled my insanity. I didn't stop there.
"And now... we have no time to make breakfast. So son, find what you can and get in my car. You have three minutes. GO."
I filled my coffee as he dressed in silence. I gathered my things as he searched through the pantry and fridge. I walked to the garage without him and got in my car, fuming. I just knew I was going to be late.
He entered the car without word. I threw the car into reverse and backed out as he was putting on his shoes. It wasn't until a few blocks from our house that I noticed a Sonic cup sitting in the cup holder.
Yes friends, my son ate a leftover Blizzard for breakfast.
It wasn't until we were a few miles away from the house that he finally broke our silence.
"Mom, I'm sorry I didn't wake up enough this morning. I'll try harder tomorrow. I promise."
It took every ounce of my being not to break into tears. Yes, he needed to get his ass out of bed. Yes, he needed to get ready for camp. Yes, he needed to move a bit faster.
But somewhere in all this hurried life, I forget that he is my child. He deserves more respect than I give him at times.
He deserves breakfast.
He didn't give me his normal half lean hug at drop off, either to embarrassed to be seen with me or keeping his distance from my ever changing rants of late. I felt immense guilt as I drove to work hurriedly. I arrived 10 minutes before my first meeting of the day to learn it had been canceled.
I wish I was fearfully and wonderfully made but I realize that I am filled with faults. Most are apparent to me as a mother as I have daily reminders when I am not perfect... which is most days.
Tomorrow will be a better day. I will get up earlier, finish my morning chores fast and snuggle with my buddy until his eyes are open. We will make breakfast together and chat about our upcoming day of events. I will not scream at him about taking his time because I will ensure we have enough.
Thank God we get a fresh start each morning. What better blessing could we have than that?
Have a great evening, friends.
Jen
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