Thursday, September 06, 2012

Make New Friends, But Keep the Old

As I was getting ready yesterday I heard an interesting tag line by the anchor person on the local news.  I instantly thought to myself "Man, I need to blog about that!"  Yep, my brain absolutely works that way.  So here goes!
Is it ever okay to divorce a friend?
Hmmm.... begin pondering.
Yes.  It is.  At least in this girl's humble opinion.  And unfortunately (or fortunately, in some cases) I have done just that.
A friend of mine via my little guy's sports actually posted something about this on facebook awhile back, so I'm totally going to steal from her a bit.  Publishing liberty.  I'll give her credit (you know who you are JK!)
“People come into your life for a REASON, a SEASON or a LIFETIME.” 
Honestly, I have a lot of seasonal friendships.  People that come into my life that I learn from, grow from or share something in common with for a short while.  I get a lot quickly out of these friendships since I'm an "all or nothing" type person and give it my all... for awhile.  I'm not quite sure why people that are seasonal don't stick longer with me but suffice it to say I think it's because I grow weary and bored of them.  Yes, I'm an ass to admit that.  But it's the truth.
My reason friendships are awesome.  These are the folks that I need for one reason or another.... wait, I need someone?  Heck yes I do!  A lot of my work friendships fall into this category.  I have stayed friends of course with people AFTER I stop working somewhere (which has only been 3 times in my life) but most of the ex-coworkers I have I didn't stay in touch with after our separation.  It isn't because I don't like them - it's because I don't need them any longer.  Or friends in this category sometimes say or do something I won't forgive.  Or they leave and go somewhere else and I lose them.  Something happens and we become interrupted.  And our friendships end. 

"I'm finished with this guy" ~ Vinny Gambini, My Cousin Vinny.
The lifers?  Well... this is an extremely limited class for me.  These are honestly people that could literally crap on me, apologize, and I would love them anyway.  Yeah - it's a short list.  But trust is a big thing in this category and I require people to earn trust before I give it to them.  I'm stubborn like that (damn Scorpio).  And I have to know in deep in my soul that they have my back, no matter what.  Not that many people are that giving, quite honestly.  And I thank God every day for those here because without them I would seriously struggle through life!

I take stock in my friendships from time to time.  I try to consider and weigh them carefully.  Sometimes I question myself ~ what does this person think of me?  What does our friendship give to one another?  Am I there for them enough (or as much as they would want me to be)?  Are they there for me?
I deleted over half of my facebook friends last year for this very reason.  I nixed everyone that I hadn't spoken to (verbally or in writing) for over a year.  Why exactly am I "friends" with them on a social media outlet if I never, ever speak to them?  That's not even one of the categories listed above!
She finished her post with saying "It is said that Love is Blind but Friendship is Clairvoyant".  I'm not sure I would agree that all of my friendships are clear sighted, but I get the gist.  We do choose our friendships quite carefully (at least putting them in the buckets above). 
Food for thought, friends.  Do your friends have certain meanings in your lives?

Hope you have a great Thursday!


1 comment:

  1. Yep! And we are "lifers". Love you friend. :)