Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Remove that Hair!

Okay girls, it's time to have a talk.

What is up with all the hair??  I realize that every time you turn on the radio a commercial for laser hair therapy is blasting.  Obviously, we are tired of shaving.  I get that.  Compounded over 25 years, I've probably spent a zillion dollars in razors, shaving cream and TIME dealing with my unrulies.

But seriously... what the hell is this crap on my chin?

Every couple of weeks while brushing my teeth, I see one.  And it's usually not a short one... it's a long one.  Which mean those people that SAY they are my friends have seen this unholy atrocity hanging from my face and not said a word to me.  That is absolutely unacceptable!  That means that if I had friends hanging from my nose (which I'm particularly worried about all of the time) that nobody would tell me?  If I have spinach in my teeth, would someone let me walk around in embarrassment?

I just don't get it.  I'm getting older.  Isn't my hair supposed to stop growing?  CRAP!  I find these little lonlies in other places, too... like on a mole on my forearm.  Okay, God... this is NOT funny.  I'm like an old Dodge - you have to do a walk around before getting in to leave for the day to ensure everything looks okay.  Great.

So I guess it's time to start getting an idea of what this laser hair treatment stuff costs.  I can't let a rogue one go one day to find out that a client saw it.  I don't want to be that old woman that has a beard and 'stach and everyone just points and mocks.  I already wax my brows and on occasion (gasp) my upper lip.  Geesh!  This is totally unfair... I don't want to have to wax my entire body every two weeks!  Guess I'm going to have to get a punch card to Ideal Image, because trying to manage it on my own is NOT working.

If I am one of the unfortunate souls to acquire Alzheimer's or dementia, SOMEONE needs to visit me every single day.  With tweezers.  And make sure I don't look like a Sasquatch.

I mean it girls.  We gotta stick together!  I can promise you this.... if you have a lone strand out of place I will most definitely tell YOU!

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