Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Lordy, lordy... look who's WHAT?!

The good news is I am still alive.  I woke up this morning still breathing in and out.  Although I'm still convinced my heart rate is elevated.  I guess that means I have survived turning 40.  Thus far.

I don't feel any different.  Not any more tired than yesterday.  Nothing hurts anymore than it did yesterday.  Body and mind still intact.

Any wiser?  I should hope so, but I doubt it.  At least not in one day.

But I have learned some very valuable lessons as I depart my 30's that I think warrant sharing.

1.  Don't dwell on the small stuff.  Life is FAR to short to be worried about what kind of car you drive, if your Coach handbag is better than another friends or if your jeans have the right label on the ass.
2.  If you have kids (especially only's or the oldest), don't ride them all the time.  They don't have to be perfect.  They will turn out just the way they should.  Pressuring them like a cooker will just make them resent you.
3.  If you have more than one child, hug on the baby of the family ALL THE TIME.  Soon they won't be and hugs will get restricted, particularly in public.  I know this, I'm a BOF :)
4.  Career climb?  This one is tricky and depends on your ultimate goals.  If you want the half million dollar house and 2011 Mercedes, climb away.  Skip rungs if you can.  Work until your fingers bleed, but don't expect a lot of family understanding.  If you have kids and plan to do this, be careful.  They will soar through those 10 years and you will wake up and they will disregard you for never being present.  If you aren't driven by "stuff", go ahead and stay steady working the job that makes you the best person you can be.

And my last piece of advice ~ and this is the BIGGIE ~ don't forget while you are working your tail to the bone, trying to earn money and giving 150% (I HATE that term... not even possible), don't forget you have a spouse.  Oh yeah, that dude that lives in your house (or gal, if any guys read my blog).  Remember him/her?  Yeah.  If you plan to sail through your 30's ignoring your partner, be ready in your 40s when the kids are teens (or gone) to get out your pen.  Chances are VERY high your partner will do one of the following:

a.  cheat
b.  cheat and leave you
c.  cheat, leave you and ask for divorce
d.  cheat, leave you, ask for divorce and want 50/50 custody of your kids
e.  cheat, leave you, ask for divorce, want 50/50 custody of your kids and remarry in 6 months

So unless you want one of those items to occur, I suggest you pay a slight amount of attention to them while going through the career, the kids and the metabolism meltdown.  Just find yourself a nice outlet (I have LOTS of wine suggestions), laugh with good friends as often as you can and smile away.  Try to be grateful for all the things you have and don't get bogged down in how hard all of it is.  The good news is people all around you are doing exactly the same thing! 

So lift your glasses up... drink to my big 4-0.  Glad I made it this far.  I only hope my 40's will give me more wisdom, strength and courage to be the real me, a nice boost to my career and an exit strategy for d-day (my ultimate goal).  CHEERS!

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