Monday, May 07, 2012

My Inner Warrior

Monday again.  Ugh.  I try to be one of those super positive peeps that doesn't fall into the narcissist blah blah woe is me camp, but today I just don't want to.  So there.

I officially survived Warrior Dash, although I wouldn't say unscathed.  I'm pretty sure I broke both my ankles.  In an attempt to keep up with the likes of Ruckus Run, Commando Run, Rugged Warrior and Tough Mudder, Red Frog, LLC decided to make this year's Warrior Dash a little bit more difficult.  Um... they succeeded.

I'm sure this will be post 1 of 2 as we don't have all our pictures in just yet but I can share what we have now for all you future "I'm 40 and want to act like a bad ass even though my body won't let me" Warriors.

Pre Race - the EC Warriors!

For those of you unaware, Warrior Dash is a 3.1 mile race with adventure obstacles.  Last year as newbies, the EC Warriors (my crew) were quite worried about how we would make it through.  It was so easy peasy we thought... sure, why not do it again?  Hubs was making his debut 11 months after spinal fusion surgery - can I just say that again?  Unbelievable!

You can now insert the "why oh why would anyone be that stupid" comments... these people would!

The Dash started out with a 1 mile run, of course not on our flat pavement we run every day.  Up and down meadow hills, basically.  It was important to be weary of each step as to not turn an ankle in a hole ~ that kind of terrain.  Our first obstacle was Storming Normandy - a series of barbed wire that you had to crawl under military style at differing heights.  Fun!  Other than dirty knees, not that big of a deal.  We survived!  The rest of the obstacles won't be in particular order... because I can't remember how they fell.  

Chaotic Crossover was a series of cargo nets horizontally presented but we crossed those with no problem.  Then... bring on the water.  Tightrope Tipsy was up next ~ crossing water holding onto ropes.  Once we figured out a strategy, we were able to cruise across without much work (I went backwards and pulled my weight rather than fought against it!)

Up next.. the Trenches.  Oh poor Davis was the only thought going through my mind.  Dug trenches covered in plywood, only big enough to shimmy your body through to the other side.  He can't even get an MRI without medication so I knew this one would be a true test for him.  Amazingly, he breezed right through!  That man constantly surprises me with his determination!

The Capsized Catamaran gave JP and I a chance to get up close and personal with strangers.  Swim out 15 ft, climb over buoys, swim more, climb again and then swim 15 ft to get out of the water (in which you are SINKING up to your knees in mud, by the way).  We had to get a leg up to get over the buoys... thank god EVERYONE smelled like we did otherwise there might be some 'splaining to do.

And then my demise.  We are soaked, muddy, slick.  Climb up ladder to a platform 15 ft off the ground, slide down a fire pole.  Insert joke here.  I was scared at the top but of course I wasn't about to show that to anyone.  Thank GOD JP was right next to me.  I started to slide but the metal burned my hands, so about 10 ft off the ground... I let go.  I fell straight down and landed flat on my feet, turning both ankles simultaneously.  The obstacle worker freaked and jumped out of his chair "ma'am... don't move.  I heard them pop".  Well... I'm half way through.  No way I'm stopping now.  But the pain was EXCRUCIATING.  Think Nashville marathon pain, times 2.  This really, really hurt.  Hubs had stopped and come back after seeing me on the ground, refusing to leave my side.  JP was an amazing friend... refused to rush forward without me although I insisted on it.

The rest of the obstacles are a slight fuzzy blur, as I ran and fought through immense pain.  More cargo nets, Vertical Limit (which I could do), Giant Cliffhanger (which I could not do... I couldn't bend my ankles to walk up a flat wall holding onto a rope), Great Warrior Wall (ouch), Tire Run (which I did but thought I was going to die), and finally... the Warrior Roast.  I jumped those flames like my life depended on it, being careful not to land on my right foot which by now was swollen over my tennis shoe and throbbing.  Hubs and JP finished with me in the Muddy Mayhem and we held onto each other (or they held me up) for our photo op.  I truly don't know what I would have done without them.

I hit the medic tent afterwards and before I could even say fire pole, they asked me "did you do this on the fire pole?"  By the end of our heat (which was the first heat of the weekend), they had shut down the fire pole and were making people go down the ladder ~ wait, there was a LADDER??  I totally would have bailed had I known that!!!

I have a medal.  I'm a bad ass that survived the Warrior Dash.  The after party was awesome and I had the coldest, most satisfying Miller Lite(s) of my life.  But now, alas, I pay for my fun.  Both ankles are wrapped, alternating ice and elevation.  I'm pretty sure the right has something seriously wrong but I'm trying to ride it out.  And Davis went out to run his miles for our 1/2 training without me this morning.

Injuries suck.  But friendships and experiences last a lifetime!  GO EC WARRIORS!

Bundys ~ rockin' awesome Warriors!
Parks don't Walk Warriors!

Happy Monday, friends!  I hope you have a fantastic week and find your inner Warriors!



  1. Jen, jen, jen! I know your mother is rolling her eyes and wondering when her little girl is going to grow up. You and Lori need to get together. She worries me constantly with all her arobics. So sorry you are hurt though, I know you trained hard for this. If you need a ride anywhere, just call me. I am available at any time. Please take care. Love you

  2. You're definitely a badass in my book! Hope the ankles heal soon!