Sunday, May 13, 2012

Momma Pride

I love being a mother.  It is by far the most rewarding job a woman can ever have.  Even when you screw up, even when your kids screw up, that bond of unconditional love between a mother and her kiddos is unbreakable.  Hence the reason you can see women stand in the court room of their child being convicted for murder and weep for their child.  Unconditional.

Bubba is heading out to boot in 36 days.  36 days.  I can barely type that without feeling my heart come up into my throat.  Mostly, I am SO excited for him.  He is going to have so much FUN.  I can't believe I'm typing THAT either!  This is so perfect for him... to be part of a team, to be honored and respected for his work, to have giant expectations placed upon him to strive to be his best.  This is where he shines best.

Bub's story could have been so incredibly different.  Academics were incredibly rough for him and not because he isn't incredibly smart.  His attention to detail, tenacity and determination are fantastic.  It was always the "little things" that he hated ~ those daily homework assignments that meant nothing in the real world.  Things he thought didn't make a difference.  So in the midst of struggling through high school, he took a road I had BEGGED him not to take pretty much his entire life... he worked for the bio dad's family business.  Key word FAMILY.  Yikes... run away.  It had already taken it's toll on another marriage and family unit so I was quite worried about this.  And quite frankly... I never, ever wanted him to settle into a "given" and not work to his total potential.  I prayed A LOT while he worked there.

He graduated high school and continued in the business.  He declared he wasn't going to college.  I cried a LOT.  I felt like a failure... like he settled.  My worst nightmares were coming true.

Then the best thing that could ever happen to him occurred:  his bio dad remarried for the 4th time and the new wife had a son that needed a job.  Could see this coming a mile away.  Immediately following my son's honeymoon, he returned to work to find out his job was eliminated (right... replaced is the proper term).  So the tie was cut.  My prayers were answered.

It took Bub a bit to get his footing after that.  He worried a lot about what he was going to do.  I didn't.  I knew that no matter what direction his life took it was going to be tenfold better than the one he had originally started.  And I was right.. thankfully!

Flash forward three years and my son is leaving in 36 days.  He is following a dream ~ one he has had for years but didn't have the courage to travel.  His amazing wife is fully supporting him and will be departing shortly after him (which will be harder for me I think than his departure).  All is right in the world.

Sometimes I focus my energy on hating the ex and his 4th wife for what they have said and done to my kids... but today, I relish in it.  It was the perfect set up to the perfect life for my kids, without drama, without pain, without conditional love.  They are able to spread their wings and be free.

As for my little guy... well, he is perfect.  I am amazed at how easily being his mom has been.  He makes me proud every single day.  He makes great decisions, he is compassionate, loving, caring for others and unconditional in his love for others.  And nugget?  Well, I couldn't be more proud of my beautiful children giving me the most amazing little boy EVER.  I feel successful as a mom today. :)

Happy Mother's Day to all my beautiful, fantastic, amazing friends and family.  You are all cherished by me... unconditionally.  I applaud you for the daily work you perform in raising your own children.  

Love you, friends!


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